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The Rent in the Galaxy by Travis Flatt


When Earth wakes up thirsty and reaches for the nightstand and can't find the glass she always sets out the night before, she'll think, "Shit, I must have drunk all the water in the middle of the night. Why didn't I go fill it up in the sink?" So she'll stumble, parched, to the kitchen, turn on the faucet, which will run dry, and call out down the hall, "Hey, who forgot to pay the bill? What the fuck?" And the Moon, Mars, or whoever will answer, "That was supposed to be the humans." Mouth tasting like bitter ass and lips cracked, Earth will think: "That sounds about right." They never pay their rent. She'll collapse on the couch and wonder why she didn't take anyone's advice and kick them out months ago because now the weather's fucking terrible, all the plumbing's shot to hell, the trash has piled up, and the last time she checked, rent's climbed insane all over. If you can even find a place in the galaxy. Then, she'll sit fuming and pissed. When the humans come home, there will be absolute hell to pay.


 


Travis Flatt (he/him) is an epileptic teacher and actor living in Cookeville, Tennessee. His stories appear or are forthcoming in JMWW, HAD, Rejection Letters, Heavy Feather Review, and other places.

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